We Interrupt Our Regularly Scheduled Blog...

... to bring you a review of my day!

All of today's blogging time was set aside for mother/daughter eye exams, grocery shopping, drug screening/testing for my employment, and a visit to my new school to pick up keys and drop off classroom materials. I think it's time for me to post some drafts in the queue just in case, but until then:

* I still don't care for the blowy-puffy-here's-grit-in-your-eye procedure that optometry techs seem to enjoy watching patients endure at the beginning of an eye exam. What *is* that thing, anyway? Is my eye dusty? Are you testing me on my blink and flinch coordination? Are you checking my mascara's and eyeliner's staying power? My eyes water just thinking about it!

* I've been experiencing some confusing encounters at the grocery store I've been frequenting here since our arrival. It's on post, and each time I've gone, I've been approached by older ladies and gentlemen asking if my kids are "ready for VBS." Huh? Each time their table has been surrounded by other people, so I've only been asked that one question before the greeter has turned his or her attention to someone actually interested enough to stop and look at their display. It wasn't until this morning's trip that I finally saw the table itself- and realized that VBS stands for "Vacation Bible School," not "very big shoes" or "very bratty siblings." Enough with the abbreviations folks. I get it with my husband's military-jargon, I get it with all sorts of edu-speak, and I see it as I try to figure out just what my daughter is asking me for when she text messages me on her phone.

Spell...the...whole...thing...out...please. And if you won't, please just step aside as I maneuver my way through the store with my thrilled-with-the-acoustics-toddler to get a loaf of bread, a container of milk, and a stick of butter.


* Drug screening. Today was the first time *this* kindergarten teacher has had to walk in to a medical facility, surrender her i.d., allow someone else to lock up her purse and do the little aim-for-the-plastic-cup-routine with an audience standing right outside the bathroom door. Oh, and I wasn't allowed to flush the potty afterward either. Yep, everything had to be as...witnessed...as possible. Wow. Just...wow.

* Yes indeedy, I did get the key to my classroom today! Dear Daughter and I were so excited, so pleased, so impressed with what we saw as we walked through the school, peeking into classrooms, lounges, cafeterias, etc... and when we got to see my room, I just about cried. This is the first time I've been given a classroom that is fully supplied. FULLY. I guess I'm no longer at a Title I school, and the difference leaves me in awe, and saddened. Standardization across the nation? Honeys, it isn't happening.

The classroom is beautiful. Most of it is appropriate for kindergarten, though my teacher's desk is fixed to the wall as part of a built-in, and it seems I can't lower it to a better height for use as the reading table. The students' coat cubbies are actually closets with doors (another interesting safety issue) and I have tons of storage for manipulatives, books, etc. I'll be sharing a bookroom and a set of student bathrooms with one of my colleagues by way of two "walk-through" areas.

* I've brought home a school binder that seems to have our policies and procedures explained in it, but getting them committed to memory is becoming more difficult with each new move I make. Every school has its own set of rules, procedures, routines. The first one used clipboards for fire drill and stranger danger drills, the next had little red and green paddles we were to hold up outside during a fire alarm along with scrap pad sign-off sheets that had to be turned in to the office after each drill. The next required a binder or notebook with students' names and contact info, while at this, my newest school, who knows what the variation will be. In the past six years, I have had to follow four different rulebooks on school procedures for fire drills, xerox copying, attendance reporting, lunch requests, stranger danger, parent pick-up, field trip requests, classroom newsletters, professional development, parent teacher conferences, NCLB documentation, lesson plan formats and due dates, social club dues and rules, phone etiquette, lunch time and recess procedures, before and after school bus duty, parking space assignments, computer lab sign up, nurse pass procedures, email and internet do's and don'ts, office errands, teacher lounge clean-up, grade level planning times, preps, and tornado safety practice. Talk about a jumble.

*****

Off to bed (this is a late night posting)- I have a classroom to inventory and set up in the morning!